Blehk! Athletic Long Shorts

Ask anyone's mom, sports outfits can be A LOT of hassle, but with these long shorts there's no need for complaints! Nope! Just throw on a pair and go running, swimming, weight-lifting, or any other activity that pops in your mind. These shorts won't let you down like your dad did that time he forgot to come to your first home game in ninth grade and you hit your head on another kid's head and you had to go to the hospital and they said you'd be ok but deep down you knew you'd never be ok because even then you knew that life is just an eternal wasteland of suffering and taxes. But then you saw these shorts and it was like the tiniest glimmer of hope and suddenly everything didn't seem so bad anymore! Then you got really into parkour and people made fun of you at first but that didn't stop you because you had really cool shorts on and that's all that mattered. Now you're worldwide sensation and a parkour champion and it's all thanks to me for making these dope shorts.

These shorts are made in traditional men's sizes, but are great for anyone wanting a longer, looser fit!